I believe in happy endings, mine just seems so distant.
Saturday, November 26, 2011 @ 6:42 AM

It could be that I've been wanting too much; self-indulgent and ungrateful my whole life.

So eager to have things go my way, how I've planned it. Before any type of certainty I've developed a horrible vice of circulating those desires in my mind, expecting it to become reality. I would be lying if I said that nothing goes my way, but it's sure seems close to it.

Wouldn't life be a hell of a lot more bearable if your wishes came true? If 11:11 wasn't nothing but bull shit. If Santa Claus actually existed. If the Fairy Godmother wasn't a drawn out made up character. These mere ideas are exactly the things that fuck with us. Complete lies to enhance someone's dull life and to feed gullible people false hope. They were created so the hopeless would have something to hold on to, even if it's plain nothing.

For once, I'd like to experience stability. No longer do I want to feel like my world could be taken from right under me, sheltering myself in from constant paranoia. I want to be assured. No more playing games with my mind, no more guessing. I want to be certain without my thoughts wavering from one thing to the next. For once, it'd be nice to experience "forever" rather than the common lie that is said. General happiness won't last for an eternity, no, but you can always manage to find happiness again if you're with the person you love. This all ties in with consistency, stability, and certainty. I just want someone reliable enough to bear through everything with me until the end.

I want a future with you. And once will be enough.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011 @ 9:50 AM

The road to success isn’t traveled much anymore. Most people are now taking the shortcut, which usually takes you right back to where you started.

— Susan Gale

Reality check.
@ 9:46 AM

What kids fail to realize these days is that without trying, you won't get anywhere. They seem to expect good things when they haven't done shit to earn them. Time is wasted partying and "living the life" when sooner or later, life will turn into shit and regrets. High school is a just another stage of life, but the one that will most likely determine your future. Decent grades and intelligence isn't everything to success but it'll sure take you further in life than doing nothing. Life isn't all fun and games, and it doesn't revolve around bad influences. Your success isn't determined by how many times you threw a party. No one is going to acknowledge and reward you for getting laid this many times. You aren't going to receive respect for attending the most parties in a year. The general mindset of kids these days ruin their potential.

Sunday, November 13, 2011 @ 4:05 AM

I invested so much hope into you, there's none left for anyone after you.

I look for you in everyone.
Saturday, November 12, 2011 @ 6:23 AM

It's scary how much an individual human being can impact you.

They say when you spend time with someone for too long, you start to pick up their characteristics. Some even say you begin to look like them. Unconsciously, their favorite things become yours, your speech reflects theirs, and the same things that annoy them, start to annoy you. You've grown so mentally and physically attached that you are under their influence. As the days go by, you cannot pull yourself off and picture yourself independently. Whenever you would think of yourself, that person is there too, right next to you. Ironically, their flaws look like perfection to you. You love them because of such imperfections and what others may perceive them as become irrelevant.

What happens next is obvious, but unexpected for those who are experiencing it. The person whom you've held so close to your heart is no longer with you. The reasons for parting are infinite. You want, no, need them to come back to you to fill the space they've left behind. You haven't realized before how much their absence hurts and although it feels familiar, how you feel then is a whole new kind of pain. Putting aside your pride, you approach them for another chance. But it's become too late. They've given up. No hope is left.

By no choice, you face the world to begin anew. Yet all you find yourself doing is searching for someone just like the individual in your past. You look for them in everyone, knowing no one will be quite the same.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011 @ 10:22 PM

It's not what I feel for you. It's what I don't feel for anyone but you.

@ 2:59 PM

Saturday, November 5, 2011 @ 5:40 PM

@ 5:37 PM

Trusting someone is a simple yet difficult task. Everyone I've met, including myself, fear being betrayed by the people that they care about. It's truly a difficult thing to believe in someone completely because not one person will reveal every thought that passes through their mind. Being aware of this fact, it is only normal to have doubts. What matters is what you let those doubts do to you.

This is why trust is so important. Those doubts that're kept within your heart are either going to consume your every thought or just be simply ignored. You become paranoid when trust is lacking. For no logical reason, you start to doubt their words and nothing seems true until you see it yourself. Without even realizing it, you become the reason for the relationship's downfall.

Many think trust comes by forcing things upon others when really, it's the exact opposite. Trust isn't gained with force, it's only possible with the proper amount of freedom. Allow the chance to prove themselves as trustworthy. You can't stick them in a box, tell them what they can and cannot do, force them to excommunicate with their friends, and basically expect them to do whatever you wish and then claim to "trust" them. That isn't trust, it's being controlling, and it shouldn't even be considered as a relationship.

It all just comes down to being afraid.