Wednesday, June 1, 2011 @ 9:45 PM

This problem seems familiar. A bit too familiar. I guess if someone has gotten through the same mistake numerous times, they would've changed by now. But no, I can never seem to change. I can never learn. All I ever do is break promises and regret the decisions I've made after it's too late. I lose hope by the end of it and I feel so low that I can't bring myself back up again.

Things are different this time though. I have to fix and mend the scars that I've created. I have to prevent it from occurring, ever again; it'll just be extremely difficult. I can't live with all the guilt that'll be put upon me if I fuck this one up. I know that I have to try extra hard, I know I'll have to end certain habits and create better ones. I can't afford to disappoint another person, especially you. You're the last person I want to be upset at me. The biggest phobia I have is for someone to lose complete respect for me. I'm afraid that one day, you won't think of me as great anymore. I'm afraid you'll feel different and your feelings will waver. I don't think I'll be able to live with a proud smile on my face if I can't even satisfy you.